New Year's Anxiety

Another year has gone by and for 2008, it's good ridance!

New Year's Eve usually finds me in high gear...cleaning, organizing, completing projects, tossing stuff, all in anticipation of a bright, new year. This year the activity level is a little subdued. The house is clean, but the real work is hidden away where it doesn't scream at me everyday. Because I spent so much of this year dealing with grief and depression, my projects just got piled higher and deeper. When they became too overwhelming, I found a way to make them disappear for a while. Now that I am starting to reclaim my life, I think about how long it is going to take me to get things done, I realize that 2009 is going to be a year of completion for me. I am vowing right here and now that I am not taking on anything new until I complete the leftover business of 2008....and there is so much of it.

The urge to tear through my house and throw things out is starting to gnaw at me. I look around and see things that I am just tolerating....a plant that doesn't grow and won't die, a book I bought that bores me, paperwork that I thought I would take care of but is only for someone else's need to know my opinion. I want these things out of my house. I want to stop thinking about things that don't matter to me. I have some serious sorting to do of my mother's things. Right now they are packed away in 50-60 boxes that each require careful consideration before I just toss them out.

Some time in the course of this next year I need to find an income. It appears that my passion for the financial services industry will not be on the menu of ideas to entertain. The market has tanked big time and won't be back anytime soon. So I will have to investigate other opportunities. I have had a Plan B in my back pocket for a while, but I have been reluctant to move in that direction. There may not be a choice about it now.

There is a lot to look forward to in the New Year...namely the inauguration of Barack Obama. I am so impressed with this man's intelligence, innovative ideas, diplomacy, and gracious manners. I believe he is going to be a president that will go down in history for far more than just being the first black president. I am looking forward to following his administration and his leadership. I think he is just exactly what this country needs right now. The world seems to agree.

So, with some fear and trepidation, a little hope and a lot of resolve, I am welcoming 2009.